https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more daily 0.75 2021-10-06 https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/view-of-the-world monthly 0.5 2020-11-29 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603984843893-MMLIUK0T6044MO6BC1PO/greg-rakozy-oMpAz-DN-9I-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - How to be More Than the Sum of all Your Parts Photo by Greg Rakozy on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603985911737-XCLO1V9AYPTSRAPEK6IU/vladislav-babienko-KTpSVEcU0XU-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - How to be More Than the Sum of all Your Parts Photo by Vladislav Babienko on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603985574081-XGIZASD2CDN1VUIWEPHV/john-salvino-bqGBbLq_yfc-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - How to be More Than the Sum of all Your Parts Photo by John Salvino on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603986042931-ZQFWVIV6PZSDT8XQ6J9N/priscilla-gyamfi-xVRIFWOBK3U-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - How to be More Than the Sum of all Your Parts Photo by Priscilla Gyamfi on Unsplash https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/awareness-is-the-first-step monthly 0.5 2021-02-09 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604446536151-754TCP6OF7A6K972LKMO/photoholgic-CSyT2auC69w-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - You can’t change the world The missing piece couldn’t be filled with helping others. I needed to look elsewhere. Photo by Photoholgic on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604446630469-6J43QKF9AJX81CEKRP16/sharon-mccutcheon-eMP4sYPJ9x0-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - You can’t change the world Books were one of the greatest tools I found to help me learn and grow as a person. Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604446704371-K4K5SARJ413JXRNFF2KK/x-N4QTBfNQ8Nk-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - You can’t change the world Climbing upwards isn’t easy. It requires work, but it’s worth it. Photo by x ) on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1606585358269-9MJR2WPRS9IIUG9E8PSO/Albert+Street+smaller.jpg Becoming more - You can’t change the world I wanted to change the world, but I had to change myself first - Albert Street by Christina Mayhew https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/learning-to-feel-again monthly 0.5 2021-01-06 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604447837897-Z8L5DXPZS5SWX0GIDDTW/tengyart-auEPahZjT40-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Learning to Feel… Again Photo by Tengyart on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1606608254647-AN9X3BSNVACPTCREUL21/joseph-frank-AVtR-h28qmI-unsplash+-+edit.jpg Becoming more - Learning to Feel… Again Photo by Joseph Frank on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604447748338-RHHOIPGOE3DHCBN78CYV/artem-labunsky-Wld1vbHaME8-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Learning to Feel… Again Photo by Artem Labunsky on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604447623530-ZWB01P7M50LA97C7QXZK/jamie-street-dQLgop4tnsc-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Learning to Feel… Again Photo by Jamie Street on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1606608351819-85P3HDK1QUF1STH8IK65/sydney-sims-fZ2hMpHIrbI-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Learning to Feel… Again Photo by Sydney Sims on Unsplash https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/treasures-in-your-deepest-parts monthly 0.5 2021-01-14 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604448768993-A7M5EFWCWY57P1SQ49JP/cyrus-gomez-x4HjxzOoIxU-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Face Your Darkness, Find Your Light Photo by cyrus gomez on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1606586040014-NWLIYYGL5ABPIIGDAFX9/Treasures+in+the+Deep+smaller.jpeg Becoming more - Face Your Darkness, Find Your Light The deeper you go, the darker it gets, but keep looking and you will find treasure - Treasures in the Deep by Christina Mayhew https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604448626209-POFM1YZ4Q740KAQ9LWUV/andres-perez-se0GXEsgtPk-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Face Your Darkness, Find Your Light Photo by Andres Perez on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1604448859809-SX9SCTPWQQPRGHXPIRWW/sharon-mccutcheon-9O1iYOHJSYs-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Face Your Darkness, Find Your Light Photo by Sharon McCutcheon on Unsplash https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/got-a-killer-identity-let-it-die monthly 0.5 2021-01-06 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1609950965461-0Z20CXS61MIJ6JQOTW8J/larm-rmah-Fu62mzS02A0-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - Got a killer identity? Let it die. Photo by Larm Rmah on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1609950879483-A9VWSTF8Z8TZTVYF4JB0/fares-hamouche-Xe9vkCD7_5g-unsplasheditted+%281%29.jpg Becoming more - Got a killer identity? Let it die. Photo by Fares Hamouche on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1609950788955-P3L03C4C98M4RO116VTZ/zach-lucero-CQ4cMjZiPnw-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - Got a killer identity? Let it die. Photo by Zach Lucero on Unsplash https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/follow-your-pain-reclaim-yourself monthly 0.5 2021-01-18 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611002596100-V41Q5SYF3HDRBPHXOQAY/andrew-donovan-valdivia-eBxLS2Ax-08-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Follow your pain, reclaim yourself Photo by Andrew “Donovan” Valdivia on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611002982200-WNZ6GAB2A4BEPFAWUPG7/jacky-lam-ZbFINckE8Io-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Follow your pain, reclaim yourself Photo by Jacky Lam on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611002661275-L4E7046PXSOSDR00ZH3N/artem-labunsky-LUaJmZM-LFg-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Follow your pain, reclaim yourself Photo by Artem Labunsky on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611002477595-K1SZL2O8RJTF5OAGBTID/christopher-sardegna-iRyGmA_no2Q-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Follow your pain, reclaim yourself Photo by Christopher Sardegna on UnsplashHea https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611003148009-P2O38WNMBEZD6H7JSOQF/clay-banks-N32JLRTANCQ-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Follow your pain, reclaim yourself Photo by Clay Banks on Unsplash https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/birth-requires-death monthly 0.5 2021-04-17 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611427688058-2VJDGGPOD914US3DR2A0/image-asset.jpeg Becoming more - Birth requires death For a long time, I held on to my Christian faith, even after I realized it was drowning me. Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611427900635-YFBDNEDFZ4KQ1VC2P7ZJ/sarah-ardin-tD3bBNS3fbI-unsplash+%281%29.jpg Becoming more - Birth requires death Photo by Sarah Ardin on Unsplash Most of the time, becoming more is an incremental thing, like a snake shedding its skin as it outgrows it. As we grow, we take the foundations that we’ve built and extend them out. But sometimes, what you’re holding onto just doesn’t fit with the place you need to go. This is what I learned the hard, painful way when I discovered that I couldn’t keep moving forward while maintaining a grip on everything I’d built up for myself. Having to let that go and accept the death I felt at its loss was one of the most painful experiences of my life. At least I’ve been born, though — born into a beautiful new way of being. And as I realize this, I can see how sometimes death isn’t the end of something, but the beginning of something new. The challenge for me now — for all of us — is to learn to see the life that lies beyond our deaths, and let that beauty overcome our fear. Only then can we let go of the security of the womb and be born into what waits for us beyond ourselves. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611427627026-SACKBGTCZJLQJ5DPD0CS/hans-peter-gauster-3y1zF4hIPCg-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Birth requires death If the shapes don’t fit then it’s just a mess, not a nicely solved puzzle. Photo by Hans-Peter Gauster on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611427564003-ZMF70BIQ7JSR25MFYA5T/alex-hockett-GiP2H_SKh7E-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Birth requires death Photo by Alex Hockett on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1611427839180-HKNQ52QAGC26881ZKJTX/eyasu-etsub-j3R9C-Xqe1w-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Birth requires death When the candle of certainty burns out we are finally able to adjust to the dark and see with new eyes. Photo by Eyasu Etsub on Unsplash Many people who make it this far end up leaving religions behind altogether because they find that there isn’t a place for them there. When I found myself in this stage, I left my church because it was no longer a spiritually or psychologically safe place for me. At first, I was really angry with them, but now I actually feel bad for them because I’ve discovered that there is so much more to spirituality than religion can offer, but they aren’t yet able to see that. Real spirituality is more about actually learning how to see than anything else. It’s about letting go of the ego so you can truly see the world for who and what it is. I believe you can’t embrace love as a lifestyle if you can’t actually see the person you are trying to love. It’s an incredibly beautiful experience to be free to love yourself and have the ability to love and accept others as they are. https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/when-voices-are-stolen monthly 0.5 2021-02-01 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1612202267682-1Y3MUF43PHEL2GY85O7Q/jen-theodore-5UeasJVXLjA-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - When voices are stolen What happened to “people wanted?” — Photo by Jen Theodore on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1612202359612-5PRP0LB4TTMTS6TOTZGV/muhammad-faiz-zulkeflee-z0-MQoZrAS8-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - When voices are stolen Photo by Muhammad Faiz Zulkeflee on Unsplash This was my experience in my final year of college. They may have worded the phrase “must have a penis” differently, but they made it utterly clear that they would only consider a male for the role — and I can assure you that this job was not for a semen donor. Yet, because I had a vagina and not a penis, I wouldn’t even be considered for the role, despite the amazing job I could have done. When I think back on this experience, it still makes me feel sick to my stomach and angry. Although I completed my degree, I never got a job in the field because I realized I would have to live my whole life proving to the people I worked for that I was worthy and capable. I would have to spend my time fighting against what I felt was an immovable wall instead of helping those trapped beyond it. I was young, and I felt so small just imagining going up against such an organization. This didn’t just take away my voice — they took away my opportunity to make a difference in the world. It rendered me helpless and unimportant. It made me less than my male counterparts. It took a while for me to realize it, but the more “job opportunities” I viewed, the stronger the pattern appeared. I became more convinced that there was no place for me. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1612202507044-CSRSZF2SGMCX1RYS6OWB/micheile-henderson-03NMNUqHPdE-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - When voices are stolen Photo by Micheile Henderson on Unsplash I am still trying to make the world a more beautiful place despite my experiences, but there are so many people that just give up. And I get it. I get why. Why would someone continue to fight for the chance to help when they are constantly ignored, devalued, and shamed? When someone’s voice is snuffed out long enough, they begin to believe the lies society told them — that they have nothing to offer; that they are nothing. Fighting for equal rights is a good and necessary first step, but unfortunately, our world needs more from us. We need to address why we have walled others out. We can’t just improve the statistics and make things ‘technically better’. We need to understand the source of what led us there— and that source is us, our hearts. We don’t want people to simply tolerate others. We need to create a world where we value and celebrate what others have to offer. I believe everyone has something they can offer our world, and it breaks my heart to think of how much better and beautiful our world would be if we had only built open doors, instead of putting up walls. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1612202435631-ZOR1W16NJN8ERM4JO8FI/ricky-singh-5ICb1ytz5cI-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - When voices are stolen When life boards you out, breaking through seems impossible. — Photo by Ricky Singh on Unsplash My story is not unique, unfortunately. I’ve heard many stories about people being devalued because they are part of a minority. This is problematic for several reasons. The first is the shame that is projected onto people. Nobody chooses their race, sex, culture, orientation, or background, yet they are told they are somehow less of a person because of it. This is so blatantly wrong I don’t even know where to begin. When we silence people’s voices, we are not only dehumanizing them; we are actively harming the world that we are all apart of. We not only violate their humanity, but we also do it to ourselves as well. We make ourselves smaller when we prevent others from using their unique strengths, experiences, beliefs, and perspectives to make our world a better place. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1612202558057-91BCND4OT8UGS57A8YJR/philipp-berndt-5i0GnoTTjSE-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - When voices are stolen Let’s open the doors.— Photo by Philipp Berndt on Unsplash It’s not too late to change. I believe we can turn our world into something more beautiful than anyone could ever imagine if we made a conscious effort to examine our hearts and open them up to what is unknown. It won’t be easy or even comfortable, but it would change humanity's course for the better. We are all in this world together. We need each other, not just those like us. We all have value, and we all have something to contribute. Let’s open the doors. Let all our voices be heard. https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/ask-not-what-time-has-robbed-you-of monthly 0.5 2021-04-07 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1615477608405-AFXBQBAMC2PUPVBG2UVP/jon-tyson-UK61KZPnpyY-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - Ask not what time has robbed you of Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash Even just looking at this short list I realize that for much of my life I fell short. And many times I still do. It’s only in the past number of years that I have really embraced living my life well. Even when I was young I thought I was living life well, but as my values shifted I realized that I put a lot of time and effort into things that didn’t actually make me into the best version of myself that I could be. I regret that. I regret constantly looking outward, instead of first searching inside myself. Sometimes I wish it hadn’t taken me so long to move to this spiritual stage of my life because if only I had more time I could do more for the world that I love. I realize that that desire may be nothing more than wishful thinking. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1615477457871-FKDU04TO077W9KMATS0E/web.jpg Becoming more - Ask not what time has robbed you of What we do one day leaves behind layers that are the foundation of the next — The Texture of our Wings by Christina Mayhew https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1615477654386-058BBBO7J1H03RVLI8JX/hello-i-m-nik-z1d-LP8sjuI-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - Ask not what time has robbed you of Photo by Hello I’m Nik on Unsplash The reality is that it did take me a long time. Perhaps not as long as it takes many others who eventually “get there” but it took longer than I wish it had for me to start living my life well. I know the many years that I “wasted” weren’t actually wasted. They were a necessary piece of my past to get me where I am today. I can accept that and continue moving onto becoming the type of person I wish to be. I will continue to learn and grow as a person because life is more about moving forward than trying to smooth out the already formed wrinkles. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1615477530066-ERKQXH45C1D1EAQJQJ6A/nathan-dumlao-Y-H5pu2oglE-unsplasheditted.jpg Becoming more - Ask not what time has robbed you of Today is not his day — Photo by Nathan Dumlao on Unsplash So here I am. Another year has come and gone. I sigh to myself. It makes sense why my skin isn’t as smooth or tight as it once was. I wonder if I’m getting grey hairs. I’m not sure I want to know. I realize I’ve got mixed feelings toward this “special” day. Thirty years ago I would have popped out of bed and been all excited about it. But as I have aged I am constantly reminded how short life really is. We only have so much time and then it’s all gone. I wonder how many things I still want to accomplish that I never will because I didn’t start them in time. I feel a twinge of remorse. It’s no wonder people created tales of extended youth long before our society even shifted from valuing wisdom and maturity to vitality and youthful exuberance. I realize I feel sad. I feel sad that I have lived for so long and have so little to show for it. I’m not actually talking about money, possessions, or a prestigious career. Those things are nice to have. I’m not against them in any way. They make life more comfortable in many ways — and that can be both a good and a bad thing. What I wish I could show for it goes much deeper than the surface-level stuff that most people see. I’m talking about the deeper issues of spirituality, wisdom, love, acceptance, and making the world a more beautiful place for everyone. It’s about understanding the value of life and how to live one’s life well. I wonder if I have lived mine well over the years. Living life well probably means something different to different people. So let me tell you what I mean by it. I believe that living life well encompasses many different things. Most of which can be summarized in the following points. Embracing the brokenness that is in everyone Learning and growing in character, so I can be the best version of myself Extending love and acceptance outward into the greater world https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/blood-in-the-leaves monthly 0.5 2021-04-07 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617829051259-QGGMTG12JNJ7N62W3OXS/david-clode-FpmSsfB26RM-unsplash-edited.jpg Becoming more - Blood in the Leaves Photo by David Clode on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617829217075-P0U9H8PE0NUJEUX98YO2/eduardo-buscariolli-9rGmxYrN-Jw-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Blood in the Leaves Photo by Eduardo Buscariolli on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617829152250-M9N8DORQP30RGTHZML5T/web.jpg Becoming more - Blood in the Leaves Blood in the Leaves by Christina Mayhew https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/strength-wont-keep-you-safe-flexing-will monthly 0.5 2021-04-15 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1618503301751-P097TQ2O1DK5KLKQO4MY/chains-1-1171128.jpg Becoming more - Strength won't keep you safe - flexing will When life yanks your chain, will you break? Photo by Adrian Olguin on FreeImages.com https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617830371842-B366G4X3PFW6HLWDO7AS/mark-potterton-sNVkn3507Oo-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Strength won't keep you safe - flexing will We need to consider what materials will be the most beneficial for the end product. Our belief system is no different. Photo by Mark Potterton on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617830313813-5SLSI3TJKUZOAO61JJUK/tara-scahill-4muedZU3eP0-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Strength won't keep you safe - flexing will When you take one path, you are simultaneously saying no to another path. Photo by Tara Scahill on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617830425055-2RTT5O81IXKX4SW7T42B/javardh-Li2zA1XG32Y-unsplasheditted4.jpg Becoming more - Strength won't keep you safe - flexing will The tighter I squeezed the more the sand fell through my fingers. Photo by Javardh on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1617830478072-QV18ZPN97U6BGKD86JS8/gabriel-jimenez-jin4W1HqgL4-unsplash+editted.jpg Becoming more - Strength won't keep you safe - flexing will Holding something loosely can have more strength than a rigid and inflexible grasp. Photo by Gabriel Jimenez on Unsplash https://outoftheashes.art/becoming-more/daring-to-dance-between-the-light-and-the-dark monthly 0.5 2021-10-07 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1633564513051-V7BF38RMVCWX8SLA2MZ2/shadowed+places+canvas-%28in%29-24x36-front-615775f1a211b.jpg Becoming more - Daring to Dance Between the Light and the Dark - Make it stand out One of my favourite paintings. It explores the shadowed places of our soul — the places where the dark and light dance together. Have you ever met someone who greeted you with a warm friendly smile and all you wanted to do was punch them in the face? You know, one of those moments where their stupid, reality-defying grin is like nails on the chalkboard of your soul. Yeah, I’ve been there too. The times where I was struggling the most were probably the times I hated those optimistic people the most. When you’re in a place like that, it’s easy for people to think that you’re just a grump, jerk, or worse. But there really is something legitimately problematic about always “looking on the bright side” (and not just because you might get your front teeth knocked out). The reality is that staying at that extreme does deny and devalue the whole truth of your experience — and of others. When someone lives their life this way they often come across as fake or in denial. They appear to be oblivious to the struggles of life. And for many people life truly is a struggle. Struggle is often viewed as a negative thing because it’s unpleasant. But things that are pleasant (including people) tend to lack depth. Struggle is a good thing — not because it’s a good thing itself, but because of where it can lead: to character. If someone can’t handle struggling, they can’t grow. Every good thing that anyone has ever done or become has grown out of struggle. https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1633564330930-T1XWUVCF3SSXV3JS335W/red-zeppelin-qZA2Lyh5xC0-unsplash.jpg Becoming more - Daring to Dance Between the Light and the Dark - Make it stand out The beauty here is in the way the dark cliffs interact with the brightness of the sun. Photo by Red Zeppelin on Unsplash https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1633564432675-OKB9GZHFJ4VHIRLCU0J8/contrast+concrete+bloom.jpg Becoming more - Daring to Dance Between the Light and the Dark - Make it stand out The picture on the right is much more appealing. The contrast pulls the viewer in and helps their eyes focus on a specific part, whereas the eyes wander around on the other, not knowing where to settle. Concrete Bloom by Christina Mayhew In the same way, we also need both light and darkness in our lives. Some bright and cheerful folks somehow naturally seem to fall on the lighter side of the spectrum. I, on the other hand, tend more toward a darker disposition. We all have a natural tendency toward someplace on that spectrum. But the reality is that although there are benefits to both, that’s only when they are balanced out. Without balance, either becomes toxic. When I was younger, much of what I felt of the world was pain, suffering, and anger. It was plain to the people around me that I was sitting firmly at the dark end of the spectrum. Some people even said they didn’t like being around me because it practically oozed out of me. That’s because that’s what my experience felt like, though, so stewing in that darkness was what felt real and authentic to me. There was so much pain around me that I truly believed that all of life was about was suffering. Even though I wanted to be happier and less focused on all the darkness, identifying with it so strongly made it impossible to move beyond it. Basically, I ended up closing myself off to the light around me. I now realize I took on so much dark that the light wasn’t able to shine through. In retrospect, it’s become clear how problematic too much darkness was, but the reality is that too much light is just as dangerous — but the danger is much more subtle. https://outoftheashes.art/faqs daily 0.75 2020-10-31 https://outoftheashes.art/contact daily 0.75 2020-10-15 https://outoftheashes.art/home daily 1.0 2021-05-11 https://outoftheashes.art/why-out-of-the-ashes daily 0.75 2020-10-24 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603559688181-57K5UOGMZEP7SWU4UYCF/DSC00176-2.jpg Why Out of the Ashes? https://outoftheashes.art/art daily 0.75 2020-11-14 https://outoftheashes.art/art/p/pangaea monthly 0.5 2021-01-19 https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1601496312239-R2QUETWH4Z2G99J214FN/Pangaea+%28small%29.jpg Art - Pangaea https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603923491285-EPJR12RCWP5H86C0P0LD/pangaea-print_mockup_Wall_Wall_16x20.jpg Art - Pangaea https://images.squarespace-cdn.com/content/v1/5f738d3753222561b453fb16/1603923489381-EDRCJW0LGF19F5VILGGM/pangaea-print_mockup_Person_Person_16x20.jpg Art - 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